Newton or Vick?

Newton or Vick?

       If you were a coach in the National Football League, you would be in position to evaluate the quarterbacks on your roster and decide who could meet your expectations, help your team build a stronger fan base and win football games. Cam Newton and Michael Vick are talented, African American quarterbacks in the NFL (National Football League), but they differ when it comes to what they could bring to your team at this point in their careers. If I were in this position, I would pick Cam Newton over Michael Vick because of his better reputation, more-rounded skill-set, and his extraordinary potential.
Michael Vick has a tarnished reputation, while Cam Newton has more credibility. Vick’s reputation took a major hit after a dog fighting scandal in 2007. Vick pleaded guilty to federal felony charges and spent almost two years in prison. While on bail, Mr. Vick tested positive for marijuana in a random drug test. It gave Vick a gangster-like reputation. On the other hand, although Cam Newton has been regarded as a “good kid” who is looking to succeed in the NFL without getting into trouble, he also knows what it is like to be surrounded by controversy. Foxsports once reported that Cam Newton committed plagiarism by turning in a student’s paper with his name on it. While Cam Newton was a sophomore at the University of Florida, he was also convicted of stealing a Dell laptop out of another student’s dorm room. Before Cam Newton signed with the Carolina Panthers, the general manager, Jerry Richardson, told Newton to not get any tattoos or piercings. While both of these men don’t have the greatest reputations, I would say Cam Newton has a better chance of gaining respect from the fans.
When it comes to athletic ability, although Michael Vick may be quicker, Cam Newton possesses extraordinary all-around ability that gives him the upper hand when it comes to their skill-set. Vick has incredible speed with his feet and is always a threat to be a running quarterback. He is the NFL’s all-time leading rusher and is still a threat to run at the ripe age of 31. Cam Newton is stronger than Vick and savvier in the pocket which helps him to get away from the elite defensive players in the NFL. Cam Newton creates big plays out of plays that looked like they were going nowhere.
Michael Vick is at the point in his career where he is coming out of his prime, while Cam Newton is a rookie and already has shown that he is going to be among the top quarterbacks in the NFL. Michael Vick is facing a more difficult time in his career, as his current team has struggled this season. Cam Newton’s team is also facing their own struggles, but he can’t be blamed for any of them. Cam Newton has done nothing short of impressing NFL fans all over the world, throwing for over 400 yards in his first 3 career starts. While Michael Vick has three or four more years before his age starts to become a factor, Cam Newton has the potential to improve every year for the next ten years.

If I had to pick between these two players, I’d pick Newton over Vick. While both quarterbacks have tasted success and know what it is like to be an African American leader on their team, I would pick Cam Newton over Michael Vick because of his better reputation, more-rounded skills, and incredible potential. Newton is going to attract fans, help the team win a lot of tough games in the future, and give an NFL coach something to smile about for a long time.

What is your say? Who would you rather have on your team for the nex5-10 years?

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Remembering while Withering

As humans we have a difficult time remembering what happened last week. Some of us have a better memory than others. Some of us have blonde hair.. Some of us have photographic memories that allow us to remember moments by seeing a slide show of photos that are engraved in our mind. We may have more memoriers that we would rather not remember than we do others that we would love to hold onto for a lifetime.

A few scattered memories that I have include: Going to my Grandma’s house in Winston Salem, NC. I remember the smell of her grass. I remember the joy in her laugh. I remember the sweetness in her smile. I also remember her blue ash-tray. I remember sitting down at her funeral and crying along with everyone in attendance as my big brother sung a song that he wrote. I remember hitting a game winning shot in the championship game when I was in the 10th grade. I remember feeling like I was in a Disney channel original movie as my teammates picked me up and carried me around the court. I remember how when I was younger, I would feel my dad’s presence come into my room to check on me in the middle of the night after he got home from work. I remember there would be nights where I would fall asleep on the couch and then wake up in my bed. I remember how I often would make my mom a cup of hot tea before I went to bed. I remember always giving my mom a goodnight kiss.

What I don’t remember is how I slowly grew older. I saw none of this. 1 Peter 24:25 says “All people are like grass,
and all their glory is like the flowers of the field;
the grass withers and the flowers fall,
25 but the word of the Lord endures forever.”

This verse is talking about how humankind will indeed eventually wither away. I’d call our tendency to forget and and grow up a part of the withering affect. Of course we are going to forget things, but how have we been affected? Why do we tend to get less emotional as we grow older? Why does our hearts seem to be harder?

For example, have you ever thought about how devastating it is that half of the people who get married in this generation don’t say married? What about remembering your commitment? What about remembering those romantic evenings?

Ins’t it so unfortunate how a man and a woman could exchange vows to be married/devoted/committed to each other and then a year later just throw it all away? I’d ask the man “Why did you look into her eyes and tell her that you picked her over every other woman in the world and then have the audacity to leave her?” And I’d ask the woman “Why did you commit your life to this man and then decide that you wanted to leave him?” I’d look at both of them and say “What about all of those nights where you looked into each others’ eyes and said “I love you”?”

Remembering your commitment should always be more important than your present season of emotions. Just because it is difficult doesn’t mean it is time to walk out the back door. The back door should be locked unless unfaithfulness or abuse is involved.

Spiritually, do you find yourself forgetting about seasons where the Lord brought you through a rough time? What about your Salvation? I constantly forget that I would be a dead-man walking if I wasn’t living in Christ. I forget about the severity of His kindness to me. I forget that there are so many people out there who don’t truly believe in Jesus so much to the point where I get in my every day routines and put The Great Commision on the shelf in my mind. Remembering and meditating on the severity of what Christ did on the cross will lead me to be a good steward of the life that I have in this world.

In Luke 22:14-19 it says

14 When the hour came, Jesus and his apostles reclined at the table. 15 And he said to them, “I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer. 16 For I tell you, I will not eat it again until it finds fulfillment in the kingdom of God.”

 17 After taking the cup, he gave thanks and said, “Take this and divide it among you. 18 For I tell you I will not drink again from the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes.”

 19 And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.”

Jesus commanded us to have communion in order to remember how he gave himself for us. This is something that happened over 2000 years ago. If humanity has such a hard time remembering how strong we felt about the one whom we said that we loved, then how are we supposed to truly believe and be affected by a biblical passage that commands us to remember how Jesus was broken for us? (Showed True Love)

Imagine this. What if you were there when they tortured Jesus? What if you stood 15 feet from the cross and witnessed all of the ridicule and abuse that He experienced in order to adopt you as His child and save you from eternal damnation? The fact that he told us to remember how His body would be bruised and beaten should draw us to remember His love. The fact that he told us to remember how His blood was spilled should draw us to Him.

Even though we can’t help but wither, we can help to remember. We must remember how the word of the Lord endures forever. We can live for His Glory that is never going to fade away. We can work through the power of His Spirit as he ushers in His Kingdom. We must be moved by remembering His sacrifice. Our present withering bodies are fleeting, but we must keep ourselves remembering. How can we possibly comprehend what He did for us? We must preach the gospel to the young and to the old.

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Progress is golden

I busted my head through the dirt in the ground
felt victory but had to look around
couldn’t find truth in every direction I searched
Truth, where are you? I’m missing you in this moment.
I’m grabbing a hold of your fingers now.. This is all that is coming out.
My soul is locked up and you’re the only energy that could break through and rescue.
Poison drips from these lips as the living water fountain sits untouched by these dusty hands.
Cart me over there because I can’t seem to make it there on my two feet.
Simplicity is so far and I’m just left with scars on my elbows and knees.
Save me from my sinning disease! Every single cubit of hope that I can mustard rests on your shoulders.
I’m relying on your peace and direction. This is the time that I have..
I don’t want gravel clogging up my lips, I want purity and sincerity bouncing alive in me, reaping genuine energy and righteous works. Not in order to earn myself in heaven, but bring ounces of heaven to earth.
Showing off your worth, I wanna do it! Heal these bones and complete the work you started.
I point to your text “According to your great Mercy” and beg you to speak that to me.
I honestly have no impressive speech, truly I’m just a dead man craving resurrection from simply death.
I wanna live, I need to live. Cut short of breath as the water runs above my chest.
It’s coming for my neck and I’m flapping my wrists as if wings could escape me from this.
My eyelids are underwater and I really can’t swim! I look for a lifeguard but they all quit.
Anyone on duty? Can anyone save me? I know Christ indeed bought me with his blood, but I keep
my head up when it’s time to be lowly. Grudging submission is not the main goal, but joy and direction
is the mission. My leg falls off the narrow road and I’m looking around spitting poison on the ground..
Living water is shooting out and I’m being carried to green pastures where my Lord and Master has told me to rest. Streams of water are rolling down my neck as I sigh and wonder why I ever lost my step.
In my conscience my curiosity rests but “fear not” is said to me cause’ greater is he that is in me.
Where is he? Where is I AM? In the midst of his plan. Redeeming and reaching out his hand.
Calling us to look back in time when he became the lamb even as we ran from him.
True love died to become alive. What a sacrifice he made to lay down his own life.
I’m perplexed and I’m stuck between these walls. I will expand, I will let go, I will fight hard. I will watch you finish the work that you started in me.
I wanna be a rock, but first I must learn how to put on my socks.

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A Cry for Clarity

Psalm 73
A psalm of Asaph.
1 Truly God is good to Israel,
to those whose hearts are pure.
 2 But as for me, I almost lost my footing.
 My feet were slipping, and I was almost gone.
 3 For I envied the proud
 when I saw them prosper despite their wickedness.
 4 They seem to live such painless lives;
 their bodies are so healthy and strong.
 5 They don’t have troubles like other people;
 they’re not plagued with problems like everyone else.
6 They wear pride like a jeweled necklace
 and clothe themselves with cruelty.
7 These fat cats have everything
their hearts could ever wish for!
8 They scoff and speak only evil;
 in their pride they seek to crush others.
 9 They boast against the very heavens,
 and their words strut throughout the earth.
 10 And so the people are dismayed and confused,
drinking in all their words.
11 “What does God know?” they ask.
Does the Most High even know what’s happening?”
12 Look at these wicked people—
 enjoying a life of ease while their riches multiply.
13 Did I keep my heart pure for nothing?
 Did I keep myself innocent for no reason?
14 I get nothing but trouble all day long;
every morning brings me pain.
15 If I had really spoken this way to others,
I would have been a traitor to your people.
16 So I tried to understand why the wicked prosper.
 But what a difficult task it is!
17 Then I went into your sanctuary, O God,
and I finally understood the destiny of the wicked.
 18 Truly, you put them on a slippery path
 and send them sliding over the cliff to destruction.
19 In an instant they are destroyed,
completely swept away by terrors.
 20 When you arise, O Lord,
you will laugh at their silly ideas
as a person laughs at dreams in the morning.
21 Then I realized that my heart was bitter,
and I was all torn up inside.
22 I was so foolish and ignorant—
I must have seemed like a senseless animal to you.
23 Yet I still belong to you;
you hold my right hand.
 24 You guide me with your counsel,
leading me to a glorious destiny.
25 Whom have I in heaven but you?
I desire you more than anything on earth.
26 My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak,
but God remains the strength of my heart; he is mine forever.
27 Those who desert him will perish,
 for you destroy those who abandon you.
28 But as for me, how good it is to be near God!
I have made the Sovereign Lord my shelter,
and I will tell everyone about the wonderful things you do.

In Psalm 73, we view a song written by a Levitical singer by the name of
 Asaph who was appointed by David. In this Psalm, Asaph simply shares his honest
 thoughts and questions as he struggles with the fact that the prideful and
 wicked people around him seem to be living blessed, healthy and easy lives.
 As he sees that the wicked seem to be doing so well, he questions why exactly
 he believes in the Lord. In verse 13, he asks "Did I keep my heart pure for
nothing? Did I keep myself innocent for no reason?" He begins wondering if
godliness has become a meaningless ritual. He can't seem to be able to get
 his mind off of why those who say "What does God know?" are living in prosperity.

This passage of scripture says that these people seek to crush others and
 they wear their pride like a necklace. Asaph says "I get nothing but trouble all
day long, every morning brings me pain." Have you ever sat back and wondered why
prideful and selfish people seem to have so much despite the fact that their
lives spit in the face of God? Asaph says that he tried to understand why
this seems to be a reality, but he came to the conclusion that this was such a
difficult task. Asaph walks into the temple of the Lord and clarity begins
to surround him. The Lord's presence is clearly in the room as an eternal
perspective and an understanding dripping with great depth runs through the
mind of Asaph. The grace and mercy of God was in Asaph's midst as the God of the
universe met Asaph, a confused and fragile man.
I am often this confused and fragile man. As the destiny of the wicked comes
into proximity, we are reminded that our worth doesn't come from what has
been placed into our hands, but instead, whatr we do with what has been placed
into our hands. Our worth doesn't come from our earnings of material things, but
instead, a relationship with a King who laughs at the silly ideas of the
wicked as people laugh at their dreams in the morning. The Lord humbled Asaph as he
realized that he was the bitter and torn up on the inside. Asaph fixes his
vision on what true security is. Not on material possessions that will
eventually end up in a trash can. He praises God for holding his hand even
when he must have seemed like a senseless animal. It is unfortonate how many of
us wake up every morning thinking like a senseless animal. We often forget that
we are called to rebel against the system of the world. We aren't a part of
this system. We are citizens of heaven. I would call myself a senseless coward
when I'm not communicating with Jesus. The Lord brings Asaph to another realm of
understanding. Asaph stops complaining about what the wicked has and begins
reminiscing about what he has in the Lord. The Lord deals with the wicked
over what we would call the long term. All who don't repent will get what they
deserve. We must fix our eyes upon the one who took the wrath that we
deserved upon Himself. He is the one who is remembering our sins no more. Asaph wraps
up his song the Lord by saying "I have made my sovereign Lord my shelter, and I
will tell everyone about the things that you do."

Asaph begins his song caught up in a cloud of confusion, complaining about
what the wicked has and how bad he feels. This cloudy beginning brought him to a
place where he almost walked out of the back door. He entered the temple of
the Lord and it all changed. A rush of understanding was given to Asaph. He saw
the big picture. The end of his song has a supernatural depth to it that the
Lord brought. Asaph sings of being wrapped up in the Lord forever and telling
everyone about the wonderful things He has done and is doing today. I want
to praise Him for loving the senseless animal I am at times. Lets wrap
ourselves us in Him and experience genuine life as we go along to be a part of what He is
doing. Lets get our eyes off of what is in the hands of the wicked, and simply enjoy being in the arms of the King of the universe.
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How do you see the truth in the Bible?

Millions of people wake up every morning with questions about the purpose for their life. Some of these people are swallowed up in depression while others bask in their selfishness. Some people just go about their day in a “just another day” same routine, kinda way. Maybe some of us believe in God but we don’t really take the bible seriously. Why? Because the idea that the Lord inspired humans to write his word is a tough concept for us to handle? Or maybe our reason for not believing in the Bible has to do with other religions also having what they call “true scriptures.” All arguments make sense in many realms. What makes our bible the truth and other scriptures false?

I’m not a bible know it all, but I am going to do my best to show why the bible is the true word of God. What we are gonna do is go through a reality check. You may be thinking “seriously, a reality check?” but what better way to see the truth than to stare reality in the face? Lets see what kinda thoughts this provokes. I’m just going to try to help you see this God for who He is and not who we have made him out to be.

What better way than to start with the first chapter and verse in the bible?

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” Genesis 1:1

The bible says that God simply was there in the beginning. He never ceased to exist. He created the earth and everything in it. By reading this it challenges us to see God for who he really is. All powerful, super natural, and held down by nothing. He does what he wants.

Our God is in heaven; he does whatever pleases him. Psalm 115:3-

Some of us may read that and think to ourselves “God sounds like a jerk who flaunts his authority over mankind.” But let me show you that our God isn’t that kinda God.

For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires. Hebrews 4:14

The reality of God’s word challenges us by throwing unclothed truth into our face.
According to Hebrews 4:14, we are going to be exposed as we continue to read.

Proverbs 2 says.

1My son, if you accept my words
and store up my commands within you,
2turning your ear to wisdom
and applying your heart to understanding,
3and if you call out for insight
and cry aloud for understanding,
4and if you look for it as for silver
and search for it as for hidden treasure,
5then you will understand the fear of the LORD
and find the knowledge of God.
6For the LORD gives wisdom,
and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.
7He holds victory in store for the upright,
he is a shield to those whose walk is blameless,
8for he guards the course of the just
and protects the way of his faithful ones.
9Then you will understand what is right and just
and fair—every good path.
10For wisdom will enter your heart,
and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul.
11Discretion will protect you,
and understanding will guard you.
12Wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked men,
from men whose words are perverse,
13who leave the straight paths
to walk in dark ways,
14who delight in doing wrong
and rejoice in the perverseness of evil,
15whose paths are crooked
and who are devious in their ways.
16It will save you also from the adulteress,
from the wayward wife with her seductive words,
17who has left the partner of her youth
and ignored the covenant she made before God.a
18For her house leads down to death
and her paths to the spirits of the dead.
19None who go to her return
or attain the paths of life.
20Thus you will walk in the ways of good men
and keep to the paths of the righteous.
21For the upright will live in the land,
and the blameless will remain in it;
22but the wicked will be cut off from the land,
and the unfaithful will be torn from it.

This says that “wisdom and understanding are from God.”
And that he is the one who “gives wisdom and understanding.”
We can also clearly see that the advice given here is beautiful. It’s right at you in the face. The bible says that even the faith we can have is given to us by God.

God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Ephesians 2:8.

So many people like to stand there and accuse God of being fake or unjust, while they walk around with hard, prideful hearts.

The book of Proverbs says that wisdom shouts in the streets.

20Wisdom calls aloud in the street,
she raises her voice in the public squares;
21at the head of the noisy streetsc she cries out,
in the gateways of the city she makes her speech:
22“How long will you simple onesd love your simple ways?
How long will mockers delight in mockery
and fools hate knowledge?
23If you had responded to my rebuke,
I would have poured out my heart to you
and made my thoughts known to you.
24But since you rejected me when I called
and no one gave heed when I stretched out my hand,
25since you ignored all my advice
and would not accept my rebuke. Psalm 1:20-25.

We break into our rage against God without even thinking that maybe this God isn’t against us, but rather for us. We forget about the God who is Great In Mercy.
We look at it as if we are in the ring against him. But what is really going on is he is staring us in the face and telling us to get out of the ring and to stop fighting because he has already won the fight. People who can’t see the truth of the scriptures are in the ring punching themselves in the jaw. They are bleeding from the face while they scream at the god of their imagination. They doubt and falsely accuse the god of their assumptions. We don’t even have common sense without him because reality abides in common truths.

The idea of believing in a god, but not the God of the bible is a complete waste of time. In fact, Paul said this.

If there is no resurrection of the dead, then not even Christ has been raised. And if Christ has not been raised, our preaching is useless and so is your faith. More than that, we are then found to be false witnesses about God, for we have testified about God that he raised Christ from the dead. But he did not raise him if in fact the dead are not raised. For if the dead are not raised, then Christ has not been raised either. And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile; you are still in your sins. Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ are lost. If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men. -1 Cor. 15:13-19.

So even if we gain all of this understanding of God being there in the beginning(as the scriptures say) And don’t reject the calling for wisdom (as the scriptures tell us not to reject it) and we even understand that faith itself is a gift (as the scriptures say) we must put our vision on Jesus and the work he did for us on the cross. If Jesus didn’t die, we are still in our sins. If we are still in our sins, there is no hope for us. Why? Jesus paid a price we could not pay. How does this reality show itself in our lives? The bible is full of raw, straight up truth.

If there was a true God, wouldn’t David pray the way that he does in the psalms?

Day and night I have only tears for food, while my enemies continually taunt me, saying, “Where is this God of yours?” Psalms 42:3.

If there was a true God, wouldn’t he tell us not to lean on our own understanding? Due to the capacity of our knowledge compared to his infinite wisdom?

Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5.

If there was a true God, wouldn’t some scientists (even with the advancements of technology) still not be able to grasp his perfection in creation?

How great is our Lord! His power is absolute! His understanding is beyond comprehension. Psalm 147:5.

If there was a true God, wouldn’t a man who truly wanted repentance humbly beat his chest before God? Seeing his shortcomings and being genuine about his issues?

But the tax collector stood at a distance and dared not even lift his eyes to heaven as he prayed. Instead, he beat his chest in sorrow, saying, ‘O God, be merciful to me, for I am a sinner.’ Luke 18:13.

If there was a true God, wouldn’t he make us aware of false teaching about him?

Now the Holy Spirit tells us clearly that in the last times some will turn away from the true faith; they will follow deceptive spirits and teachings that come from demons. 1 Timothy 4:1

If there was a true God, wouldn’t he continually come as us from an eternal perspective?

“Physical training is good, but training for godliness is much better, promising benefits in this life and in the life to come.” 1 Timothy 4:8.

And in all of this you may be saying “Ben, a ton of other scriptures in other books that claim to be the word of god focus on these ideas.”
Here is what I’d say to you. Did men respond to those scriptures in such a real way as they do in our bible? Do they call on their God who is rich in mercy to forgive them? Do they respond in worship like David?

Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs. Psalm 100:2

Do they live their life as if this God simply flaunts his authority over us? Do they look at leadership in the completely out of this world way that Jesus did?

(42) Jesus called them together and said, “You know that those who are regarded as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them.
(43) Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant,
(44) and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all.
(45) For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:42-45

Sure, it’s evident that grown men will hijack an airplane to do the will of the god that he believes in, but what did the word of the true God already address? He already warned us in His word that we must steer clear of any doctrine that preaches another message than the biblical one. Why? Because we’ll end up in a ditch, lacking common sense and understanding. We’ll lay there screaming and shouting our misunderstandings and doubts while he simply calls us to come humbly before him and trust in him. The true God is a faithful God. His will is going to be done. Maybe it’s time to stop throwing rocks at the windshield and get into the passenger seat and talk to him. Get to know him. Grow closer to him. Be transformed by him. Find purpose in Him. And pray that he is our guidance for all of the days of our lives on earth and that we could truly enjoy his presence forever in the place that he has prepared for those who know him. Perhaps his attributes are out of this world, yet that didn’t keep him from revealing himself to the world through his word and the never-ending flow of reality.

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Although Secular rap and Christian rap both attract crowds, their messages differ.

Millions of people listen to secular rap on the radio, every single day. Guys like 50 cent, Eminem, and Lil Wayne’ seem to be the most popular.

Secular rap lyrics are usually written out of selfish motives. Selfish people write selfish songs, right?

Although some of the songs can be a help to others, listening to lyrics written about past experiences and struggles, most of the lyrics seem to be tied up in fame, sex, and materialistic possessions. There seems to be a huge sense of pride in the lyrics. Many of the men who write these lyrics, blindly write out of their insecurities about life. This is unfortunate because they write their lyrics thinking that they are on top of the world and know what life is all about, when they actually have no clue. These guys write their music in order to shine the spotlight on themselves.

In contrast.

Christian rap is gaining popularity in the World. I never hear it on the radio though.

Many people would never give Christian rap a chance because most “Christian” music seems to be very cheesy. I was one of those people until I heard guys like Trip Lee, Lecrae, and Sho Baraka. These guys are spitting lyrics that are inspiring people all over the world. These artists write their lyrics, about how they used to write their lyrics but now they feel like they have a real message to give to a world that seems to never be satisfied. These men have realized that selfishness gets you nowhere. Instead of writing about fame, sex, and drugs, these guys write their rhymes with a hope to shine light on the brokenness in peoples lives, allowing them to see that happiness in materialistic things only lasts for a short season. They don’t claim to be perfect or praise themselves. They write their music in such a way that leaves the listener challenged to step out of his or her selfishness and experience true purpose in life. These guys write to shine the spotlight back to the gospel.

(  <—– Trip Lee

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A story about honesty

walk into the door being held captive by the walls of my mind. What Has happened here? Destruction sits and stares me in the face as if it was brilliant.

“I need to escape” I cry, but as I turn to my left and to my right, my sighs tell of a desperation and a lack of food on my plate.

The enemy walks in behind me, then proceeds to ask me to rate my performance as a servant. “I’m not working for you.” I answer. My mind begins moving faster as I attempt to back out of this disaster. Day after day my head hits the pillow and I can’t stop these voices in my head. Prayer quiets the noise but sometimes faith seems distant.

I see doors around me but they all feel like the wrongs ones. I am a blind man, laying on his back in a dirty ditch. Who would have known that some would call me rich?
I walk into another door and fall asleep on the floor.
I awaken to find my selfishness climbing on my back just like the morning before.

My selfish ambition and motives run up my heart. Pride jumps on my back like a hungry monkey using my body as a ladder to get to a banana on a tree above me.

I punch my pride in the face only to see it trip me up again when my head isn’t looking. I am severely beaten. I get up again but I’ve got many wounds that claim to have lips. They tell that I’ll never get out. They point at my lack of devotion and show me pictures from yesterday. I speak up with the hope that I still have.

I’m calling on you.
Carry me out of this building, you are my only hope. You must put your eyeballs on the back of my skull. You must put fresh and righteous ambition in my heart before it overflows of poison and I taste destruction. Indeed, I lay here as your creation.
Molded and created in your sight. Somehow one of a kind, but I’m lacking when it comes to loving you with all of my might.

I speak up with a voice that is still somehow existing. I call on you to rebuke the devourer as he lays on the the benches wearing his favorite camouflage jacket, ready to pop out and offer humanistic understanding and fill the air with deception as I walk on the narrow street to perfection. Not by my deeds but by my devotion to your Majesty. Is my heart with you?

Is my belief in vain? Am I wearing twenty seven masks? Is honesty practically on another planet?
I’ve got to look exactly like an ant from the Heavens, as the Godhead looks down and does what he pleases. You take pleasure in the obedience of your children.
Stick the picture of the ants working deep in the dirt under the grass into my mind, let me know that even though I’m tiny in your perception, I’m mighty when you’re active in my mind, pushing me to working to advance your Kingdom and to carry your Anointing.

Waking up in the morning to rip the masks off of my face and slam them on to the floor. Living in sin keeps me idle, I won’t live by that title. I may sin but that is my old nature. It awakens and tries to breathe but I’m alive in Christ as long as I walk in his light. I must not hide it from any sight. Taking up my cross is not easy for me. I long to carry my flesh around like it’s a slave to the spirit. You’ve officially pulled me out of this building through the ceiling.

I’m shocked, you’ve come looking for me. So undeserving but I’m seen as Holy? Seriously? You’d clean me up and place me on my feet? Now with a solid rock firm beneath my feet? The storms come raging but this house is not going anywhere. The wind is raging but I’m still singing. Darkness runs from my windows as I look out and sing your praises.

Acknowledging you in a room is like embracing truth rather than the doom that would have dominated my soul if I was to walk in alone.

Why did you speak? Oh Holy one? You could have remained silent and erased me from your memory, instead your spent your sweet energy to come down and pay my penalty when you became flesh and died for me.

Wake me up in the morning to witness your glory and grace as the birds outside my window never cease to sing your praises.

The oceans are crying out in worship, calling you to mend what’s broken. Push through my home built on sand and let the walls of confusion fall greatly in your presence.

Rebuild my home on the rock of your word and let me watch Lucifer panic as the lights in my home are restored. I would rather staple the cross on my back then allow Satan to get a foothold and bring me death.

Fill my roof with your eyes, as your watching builds integrity in my life. Let the table in my kitchen bring your paradise into perspective.

Bring comfort to my soul through the carpet on my floor. May the windows of this home never close to the light shinning down from the heavens.

Let every faucet drip of living water and let mercy invade every inch of space every morning I awake. When I stop and see Demons coming to rob me, help me lock the door and flick the light switch. For you’ve come to give me an abundant life where the truth always runs naked, and you’re gonna lock up Satan but he wants me back into prison. Put visions in his head of the day I was born again, listen closely as I say it again.. “Please forgive me, be my Savior and Lord.”
May your final words on the cross haunt the power of darkness. (“It is finished.”)
Death is defeated. Invade my soul, I’m ready for an intimate walk home.





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